Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
Do not walk beside me, either.
Just leave me alone.
* * *
The journey of a thousand miles
begins with a broken fan belt
or a leaky tire.
* * *
It's always darkest before dawn. So, if you're going to steal the
neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
* * *
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
* * *
Always remember you're unique
-- just like everyone else.
* * *
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
* * *
It may be that your sole purpose in life
is simply to serve as a warning to others.
* * *
It is far more impressive when others
discover your good qualities
without your help.
* * *
If you lend someone $20,
and never see that person again,
it was probably worth it.
* * *
Remember, when someone annoys you,
it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown,
BUT,
it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm
and smack that jerk upside the head.
* * *
The things that come to those who wait
are what's left behind by those
who got there first.
* * *
Never underestimate the power
of stupid people
in large groups.
* * *
Taxation WITH representation
isn't so hot, either!
* * *
Some days you are the bug,
some days you are the windshield.
* * *
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
* * *
Good judgment comes from bad experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
* * *
Timing has an awful lot to do
with the outcome of a rain dance.
* * *
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
* * *
Duct tape is like the Force.
It has a light side and a dark side,
and it holds the universe together.
* * *
I didn't say it was your fault.
I said I was going to blame you.
* * *
</ FONT>Eagles may soar,
but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
* * *
There are two theories to arguing with women.
Neither one works.
* * *
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
* * *
Generally speaking,
you aren't learning much
when your mouth is moving.
* * *
Anything worth taking seriously
is worth making fun of.
* * *
Diplomacy is the art of saying "good doggie"
while looking for a bigger stick.
* * *
Before you criticize someone,
you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them,
you're a mile away,
and&n bsp; you have their shoes.
* * *
If Barbie is so popular,
why do you have to buy her friends?
* * *
Experience is something you don't get
until just after you need it.
* * *
Don't be irreplaceable;
if you can't be replaced,
you can't be promoted.
* * *
You can go anywhere you want
if you look serious
and carry a clipboard
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.
Do not walk beside me, either.
Just leave me alone.
* * *
The journey of a thousand miles
begins with a broken fan belt
or a leaky tire.
* * *
It's always darkest before dawn. So, if you're going to steal the
neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
* * *
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
* * *
Always remember you're unique
-- just like everyone else.
* * *
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
* * *
It may be that your sole purpose in life
is simply to serve as a warning to others.
* * *
It is far more impressive when others
discover your good qualities
without your help.
* * *
If you lend someone $20,
and never see that person again,
it was probably worth it.
* * *
Remember, when someone annoys you,
it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown,
BUT,
it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm
and smack that jerk upside the head.
* * *
The things that come to those who wait
are what's left behind by those
who got there first.
* * *
Never underestimate the power
of stupid people
in large groups.
* * *
Taxation WITH representation
isn't so hot, either!
* * *
Some days you are the bug,
some days you are the windshield.
* * *
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
* * *
Good judgment comes from bad experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
* * *
Timing has an awful lot to do
with the outcome of a rain dance.
* * *
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
* * *
Duct tape is like the Force.
It has a light side and a dark side,
and it holds the universe together.
* * *
I didn't say it was your fault.
I said I was going to blame you.
* * *
</ FONT>Eagles may soar,
but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
* * *
There are two theories to arguing with women.
Neither one works.
* * *
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
* * *
Generally speaking,
you aren't learning much
when your mouth is moving.
* * *
Anything worth taking seriously
is worth making fun of.
* * *
Diplomacy is the art of saying "good doggie"
while looking for a bigger stick.
* * *
Before you criticize someone,
you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them,
you're a mile away,
and&n bsp; you have their shoes.
* * *
If Barbie is so popular,
why do you have to buy her friends?
* * *
Experience is something you don't get
until just after you need it.
* * *
Don't be irreplaceable;
if you can't be replaced,
you can't be promoted.
* * *
You can go anywhere you want
if you look serious
and carry a clipboard
